"You won't understand Bernice, I can never forgive my younger brother." Janet said matter-of-factly as she stood up from her chair, walked past her friend and went to face the window. She stood there quietly, with arms akimbo, casting her mind back to many years ago when her younger brother was still a sweet innocent looking boy, Janet couldn't fathom when exactly and why Jude, her only brother became a back-stabbing monster.
"Twenty five years ago, mum discovered she was pregnant, at that time I was already 9years old. She was so excited, she always had this big smile on her face and she added a little more gait to her walk. If "excited" described mum, "super joyous" described dad. Everyone was happy, aunts, uncles, first and second cousins started visiting us more than ever before. I had mixed feelings. I wasn't too happy that
another baby was coming to share the love and attention I enjoyed from my parents With me but at the same time I was happy, especially for mum, because I knew the past few years before that time had not been easy for her. You know now, extended family wahala, they wanted dad to have another child, a boy-child. So, I was happy mummy's struggles were over. When the pregnancy was four months gone, the unexpected happened; dad died in an accident. Mum cried and cried, if tears were gold, mum and I would have been among the richest people on earth- but dad never came back.
After about three months of serious mourning, mum decide to pick up what was left of her life and make something out of it, taking comfort from the fact that a child was coming on the way, the boy-child(the ultrasound said so) who will wipe away her tears. If only she knew!
The baby came and mum named him Jude, the name dad wanted. During his Naming ceremony, we shed tears, it was an emotional scene.
I loved Jude from the first time I set my eyes on him at the hospital. He was so cute and tiny, he had such a full black hair I wished he was a girl, I would have made sure no razor touched those natural jelly curls. And when he saw me, he kind of smiled (even though the nurse said it was just gas, I choose to believe he smiled. Because he did.) and held my middle finger in his tiny hands. I was touched and right then I became a sister; responsible, protective and mature.
The baby came and mum named him Jude, the name dad wanted. During his Naming ceremony, we shed tears, it was an emotional scene.
I loved Jude from the first time I set my eyes on him at the hospital. He was so cute and tiny, he had such a full black hair I wished he was a girl, I would have made sure no razor touched those natural jelly curls. And when he saw me, he kind of smiled (even though the nurse said it was just gas, I choose to believe he smiled. Because he did.) and held my middle finger in his tiny hands. I was touched and right then I became a sister; responsible, protective and mature.
Countless times I defended him at school, times I beat people up for him, nights we used the lantern to solve his arithmetic home-works. Yes, we fought but we hugged also. I spanked him but I also backed him, in every sense of the word.
Oh! How could I have forgot to tell you- We lost mum too, when Jude was two. She died of cancer. Something she's been battling with for years, even before dad died. She had a procedure when I was four that made her okay for many years, nobody knew the cancer would show up again. So we lost her too. At that time there were only two people in the world, Jude and me.
Do you know the Yoruba adage that says something about how it is the house of that person you don't love that is always far? Our house became too far for any of our extended family members to visit, we stayed in a different town though but they used to travel down to visit us until mum became sick again. No one wanted to add us to their already heavy responsibilities. I was 11 then but I was wiser than my years, I had the pin to my parents' joint account. I continued my mum's business of selling Ready-made clothes, everyday after school I would open the shop. Mum had a trusted friend in the same trade who helped everytime I needed to restock. Jude and I spent our weekends at the shop and we both lived on in our house alone. I know it's weird but we lived alone for many years.
After Secondary school I couldn't further, we've exhausted the money at the bank and business was not moving, I stopped school and concentrated all my energy on making sure Jude at least went to a Federal polytechnic.
He was already in part three when he first told me that a friend told him of an opportunity to study abroad on scholarship but that he needed about five hundred thousand to process the scholarship. I wasn't as educated as he was then, but the idea sounded dubious to me from the start.
I warned him to desist from such friends and focus on his academics, reminding him of the promise he made to me to make God proud with his results. We didn't even have that kind of money, so why should we start struggling for something we can't get? I thought my brother listened, because he prostrated and thanked me for my motherly advice.
A year later, I became the treasurer of the Union of Market Women in my town (a post they gave me because they knew I was good at handling bank transactions). The ruling political party held a meeting with us (it was close to election period) and they gave #600,000 to the Union. I had the duty of banking the money but I couldn't on that day because it was way past bank closing time. They trusted me to bank the money early the next morning.
I warned him to desist from such friends and focus on his academics, reminding him of the promise he made to me to make God proud with his results. We didn't even have that kind of money, so why should we start struggling for something we can't get? I thought my brother listened, because he prostrated and thanked me for my motherly advice.
A year later, I became the treasurer of the Union of Market Women in my town (a post they gave me because they knew I was good at handling bank transactions). The ruling political party held a meeting with us (it was close to election period) and they gave #600,000 to the Union. I had the duty of banking the money but I couldn't on that day because it was way past bank closing time. They trusted me to bank the money early the next morning.
You think I was a fool for taking the money home, knowing anything could have happened to it? Incidences of theft are rare in our town, people keep larger sums of money in their houses for days. I only had to bank this money because it's a Union money.
And nothing happened to it.
I only woke up the next morning by 11am to meet a letter on the table, telling me not to bother looking for the money or calling the police, signed by Jude. He drugged me to ensure I didn't wake up when he's leaving because I'm a light sleeper.
The world came crashing on me. I was arrested and detained at the Police's for weeks before God miraculously delivered me. It was at the station I met my husband-the rest is history. " Janet smiled amidst her tears.
And nothing happened to it.
I only woke up the next morning by 11am to meet a letter on the table, telling me not to bother looking for the money or calling the police, signed by Jude. He drugged me to ensure I didn't wake up when he's leaving because I'm a light sleeper.
The world came crashing on me. I was arrested and detained at the Police's for weeks before God miraculously delivered me. It was at the station I met my husband-the rest is history. " Janet smiled amidst her tears.
"And you ask me to forgive such a person? To think that he never left Nigeria and he never showed up at the station but spent the money frolicking with some gang and some girls? He should just stay where he is and suffer the consequences of his actions, let him send Pst Adeboye to beg me, 'Mi o le gba',seriously."
Bernice offered her an hankie and said the statement that shook Janet's resolve; "Just think of Jesus".
Bernice offered her an hankie and said the statement that shook Janet's resolve; "Just think of Jesus".
Have you been hurt and offended? Just think of Jesus. Have you been pushed to the wall, and left with no other option than to fight back? Kindly think of Him. Our Lord was tempted and tried, abandoned and betrayed, He never held it against them, instead He asked God to forgive them. He accepted an apology he never got and like a dump sheep, He laid down his life at the slaughter slab to rise up in glory. Let go and let God. Perseverance in time of trials is easy when you Think of Him.
Hebrews 12:2-3
[2]We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.
[3]Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people; then you won’t become weary and give up.
JesusCaresAndSoDoI- TiToluwaNiMi.
Hebrews 12:2-3
[2]We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.
[3]Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people; then you won’t become weary and give up.
JesusCaresAndSoDoI- TiToluwaNiMi.
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